It’s amazing what brings people out on the town. There’s an apartment complex next door to our house and one of the tenants came over to see what we had for sale. “Whoa, it’s like a little store!” she exclaimed upon entering, holding a glass of questionable contents. “Oh, I love your lamp! I want this lamp. I’ll be back for it. You guys have exactly what I need, I swear. You really do. You have everything I need. I’ll be back. Oh, I love this lamp! I want your lamp.”

After several painful minutes of rambling, she left, only to return about a half hour later with her dog in tow. She wasn’t quite as high when she came back, thankfully, but still, when she went digging through the box of miscellaneous knives, my mother-in-law and I got a little nervous. Seymour’s mom looked at me and said, “No offense, but if she goes nuts and starts attacking, you’re on your own.”

I couldn’t help laughing at that.

Finally, the neighbor lady  picked up one…